The Home Run Swing

Being Bipolar 2 can have the occasional upside.

Lavender & Decaf

It's funny what little things I've acclimated to over the years, telling myself that's just how things are and they won't change even if I try. Funny how, when I actually give sustained, serious effort to making a change, it turns out that far less is set in stone than I assume.

In My Weakness

In my weakness, His strength is made clear. Made obvious. A light to anyone who knew how unable to overcome you were.

To Change The Things I Can

There's a funny little aspect of self-hatred I noticed recently and I want to mull it over here. Most of the time, I am focused on how to deflect or negate or block out the horrible things the voice in my head shrieks. Only recently did I start to think, "But it's not entirely wrong."

Brain Screech and the Conversation Post Mortem

Sometimes I wonder if everyone has implicitly constructed a myth around a magical state of being called "normal" or "stable" where a person doesn't have random surges of anxiety or unpredictable plunges into depression.

The Anxious Mantra

When I talk about the track that plays in my head when I'm anxious, more people these days seem to get it. In some ways, it's comforting because I feel seen and understood. In other ways, it's horrifying. I should not be so broadly understood. That I am just means the problem is spreading.

The Flow

There’s something to be said for mindfulness, I’m sure. Of course, I say I am sure, but I am about as sure as an arachnophobe averting their eyes from someone’s prized pet tarantula and saying, “I’m sure it’s a lovely, friendly pet. You must really enjoy its company.”